Dedicate to Collaborate

You had it all sorted: your Parenting Plan Agreement was in place and you knew exactly who was paying what, and when. You'd discussed, argued, compromised, and accepted and you figured that the most stressful part of the split was behind you. Then COVID-19 hit. Perhaps you've lost your job or are working fewer hours. Perhaps you're running your own...

Mediation, while usually far less stressful than a court case, can be a nerve-wracking process. You may have trouble controlling your emotions, you may be nervous about what the future holds, you may worry about being heard and understood. Frankly, you'll be glad once the whole thing is over. But, I promise you, it doesn't have to be a huge ordeal....

With the COVID pandemic showing no signs of abating any time soon, it looks like we'll be continuing with virtual mediation for the foreseeable future. And this doesn't have to be a bad thing: after conducting most of my work over the last few months via Zoom, I've actually become quite the convert — it has plenty of advantages for both the mediato...

Over the years, pop sensations Abba have given the world many gifts: guaranteed floor fillers at every wedding ever, the dulcet tones of Pierce Brosnan in Mamma Mia, and an excuse to wear the occasional jumpsuit (shiny Lycra completely optional). But there's one legacy I personally could have done without: The idea that, when it comes to divorce, t...

It's a cruel irony: the very time in your life when you're feeling most vulnerable is the very time you most need to keep a level head, an even temper, and a civil tongue. No, it's not going to be easy, but learning to control your emotions as you go through the divorce process is one of the very best things you can do to ensure that everything run...

I'm going to come out and say it: virtual mediation isn't so bad. I know that, after several weeks/months of nothing but virtual meetings with everyone from your co-workers to your old college friends, we're all experiencing just a little bit of Zoom fatigue. But there are distinct advantages to moving mediation online and even before COVID-19 and ...

We tend to think of divorcing couples in very black and white terms. You have your amicable, uncontested divorce candidates in one corner, the at-each-other's-throats couples in another. The amicable bunch can hash things out themselves, no professional legal help required, while the others are going to have to engage their attorneys to fight to th...

Twenty-four hours a day, 7 days a week, quarantined together for the foreseeable future…even the strongest of couples and the happiest of families are feeling the pressure right now. However, despite the reported rise in divorce rates in China due to COVID-19, in my practice at least, I haven't seen any evidence to show that shelter-in-place orders...

Co-parenting, custody, and child support agreements can be stressful at the best of times — add in a global pandemic and its effects, and it can all become overwhelming overnight. This is especially true if you live in Clark County, Washington. The county has recently made some big changes to how they're doing family law during the COVID outbreak, ...

Like most people, you probably heaved a huge sigh of relief when the government announced the first coronavirus stimulus package back in March. And with another stimulus package likely, you can breath out a little again. After all, there are very few of us who've made it through these last few months of the pandemic financially unscathed; for many,...

Sharing custody is tricky at the best of times — and we're definitely not in the best of times right now. We're dealing with so many unprecedented changes, it can feel like we're all having to learn new ways to move through our daily lives. And while this is inconvenient and frustrating when it comes to things like grocery shopping, it can feel abs...

To say tensions are high right now is a huge understatement — the world's in a pandemic, people are panicking, and the market is all over the place. On the micro level, all these challenges turn up the volume on pre-existing issues in people's lives, especially conflicts. Take relationship issues for instance. Things that might have been problemati...

I've always had a passion for access to justice –– a fundamental tenet of the work I do is that everyone should be able to get the legal help they need, no matter who they are, or what's going on for them. Above all, it matters to me that my practice is "human-friendly," by which I mean, it needs to work with your life, not the other way around. An...

Imagine that you're overseeing a mediation between a couple who's getting a divorce. One person tells a story of being abandoned, painting a picture where their spouse is never there for them, behaves irresponsibly, and has clearly demonstrated that they don't want to be in the marriage any more. The other spouse looks at them like they're crazy, a...

Ever feel like absolutely everyone is out to get you? Your new colleague is a bit short with you during your morning meeting, so you assume they don't like you very much. The woman in the grocery store almost knocks you over in her hurry to get to the checkout. What is her problem? Your kid yells at you the minute they get home from school — you ju...

Would you support a drastic bilateral nuclear arms reduction program? That was the question posed to pedestrians in the US back in the 1980s. The results were fascinating — and go a long way towards explaining why achieving a peaceful divorce settlement can be so very difficult. A certain number of those surveyed were told the proposal for the prog...

When I first passed the bar and started working in a private firm back in 1991, my mentors pointed me in two directions: first, to juvenile delinquency court to provide indigent defense services to juveniles charged with crimes; and second, to the Clark County Volunteer Lawyers Program (CCVLP) to volunteer with their family law legal aid clinic. I ...

Like so many couples these days, you're probably shying away from settling your divorce via litigation. Maybe you don't have the heart for a public process, the finances for a court battle, or you're still hopeful that you can end things reasonably amicably. Whatever the reason, you're considering alternative methods of conflict resolution. But the...

Think about a time when a friend invited you to dinner or offered you a ride you felt an intense desire to cook for them next time, or to return the favor in some way, didn't you? And sure, you assumed that was simply because you've been brought up that way, or because you think it's nice to be nice, but actually there's a really powerful psycholog...

Have you heard of the Ben Franklin effect? Benjamin Franklin, the scientist and politician, had a bitter rival. But when he discovered that his rival owned a rare book that Franklin needed, he swallowed his pride and asked to borrow the book. The rival obliged and Franklin returned the book the following week, along with a thank you note. To Frankl...